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| If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? |    |
Joke by adaytoremember, in Jokes with no home > Wordplay - Tagged pig , voice , grunt , george carlin - Current Score: 173 - Added: 1 month ago
| Doctor Dave had slept with one of his patients and felt really guilty. No matter how much he tried, the sense of betrayal was overwhelming. But every once in a while he'd hear an reassuring internal voice say, "Don't worry, Dave. You aren't the first doctor to sleep with a patient and you won't be the last. Plus you're single. Just let it go." But, invariably, the other voice would bring him back to reality by whispering, "Dave, you're a fucking vet." | |
Joke by BigJockKnew, in Illness and mortality > Doctor - Tagged doctor , patient , sex , voice , dave - Current Score: 161 - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago
| My luck is so bad, I phoned one of those sex lines last night and got caught by my mam. She said, "I know this voice". | |
Joke by MICK THE MAG, in Sex and shit > Sex - Tagged luck , caught out , voice - Current Score: 93 - Added: 3 weeks ago
| I've just seen that NS&I advert with Stephen Hawking in it, and felt kinda sorry for him: As if being paraplegic, in a wheelchair and not being able to talk, eat, piss and shit unaided wasn't bad enough, They decided to give his computer an American voice. Gutted. | |
Joke by ididyourmom, in Celebrity and news events > Stephen Hawking - Tagged stephen hawking , voice - Current Score: 68 - Added: 5 months ago
| Man goes to a doctor and says: "Doctor, my wife recently has lost her voice. What should I do to help her get it back?" The doctor replies, "Try coming home at 3 in the morning!" | |
Joke by garrygwizz, in Sex and shit > Sex - Tagged sex , wife , voice - Current Score: 65 - Added: 8 months ago
| A priest fell over this cliff, and was hanging on with his fingertips, and he looked up and said, 'Lord, can you help me? And a voice said, 'Let go of the cliff, your body will be dashed on the rocks below, and this time tomorrow you will be sat on the right-hand side of God." And the priest said, "Is there anyone else up there who can fuckin' help me?" | |
Joke by Guest, in Religion and racism > Catholicism - Tagged priests , god , cliff , fingertips , lord , voice , rocks , hanging , help! - Current Score: 5 - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago
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