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| I'm going to go rob a bank tomorrow. I plan on dressing up in a clown wig and make up and only wearing a thong and nipple tassels. I'll carry a goat and a can of fluorescent paint in one arm and, while in the bank, I'm going to fuck the goat and throw the paint over the walls, all the time ripping up pages of a phonebook and swearing my head off. After getting the money, I'll take a shit on the floor and piss everywhere. I then will escape in a van shaped like a giant pink cock. Let's see Crimewatch fucking stage a reconstruction of that. |    |
Joke by DumbShit, in Jokes with no home > Crime - Tagged bank , thief , goat , crimewatch , clown , neil delamere - Current Score: 1711 - Added: 2 months ago
| I saw a headline on the newspaper today: "Horrific Rape in Alley" or something. I was like, "Is there any other kind of rape?" Just once I'd like to see something different: "HILARIOUS RAPE AS CLOWN SODOMISED" | |
Joke by eamonpendergast, in Sex and shit > Rape - Tagged rape , sex , clown , news - Current Score: 168 - Added: 3 weeks ago
| Gang rape is not funny. Not unless you're all wearing clown suits, of course. | |
Joke by staffer, in Sex and shit > Rape - Tagged suits , clown , rape , gang , carlin , george carlin - Current Score: 128 - Added: 7 months ago
| I was coming home from work today and I saw a Nun riding on a Clowns back. Now that's just virgin' on the ridiculous. | |
Joke by spangletoss, in Jokes with no home > Wordplay - Tagged clown , nun - Current Score: 82 - Added: 9 months ago
| I always take my work very seriously, which is why I'm a shit clown. | |
Joke by whogivesashit, in Jokes with no home > Work - Tagged clown , serious , work , i cant believe im posting this , still lets see how it fairs - Current Score: 75 - Added: 4 months ago
| A man who is friends with the manager at the local zoo is called into the managers office. "I need to ask you a favour" he says. "There's a school group coming tomorrow especially to see the silverback gorilla but he died earlier today. What I want you to do is dress up in a gorilla suit and pose as the gorilla to avoid disappointment." "No problem" says the man. "This should be fun." The next day he is in the enclosure nice and early in his gorilla suit clowning around and trying to act like any real gorilla would. The children arrive and he starts to act up for them and they all start to laugh at him. He starts to swing on the rope swing and gets quite a good reception. This encourages him a bit too much and he gets over confident and goes too high. He falls off in mid air and lands straight in the lion cage. Surrounded by lions and scared he takes the head of his suit off and screams "Help, help, I'm not really a gorilla." One lion moves closer to him and whispers. "shut the hell up or you'll get us all sacked." | |
Joke by superhorse, in Jokes with no home > Animals - Tagged zoo , gorilla , clown , animals , loon , sack - Current Score: 51 - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago
| How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit it in the face with an axe. | |
Joke by Steve Biski, in Jokes with no home > Random - Tagged clown , axe , kill , death , random , stupid - Current Score: 35 - Added: 1 year, 6 months ago
| What's the difference between a clown and an American tourist? The clown knows he looks ridiculous. | |
Joke by justincider, in Religion and racism > Americans - Tagged difference , clown , tourist - Current Score: 28 - Added: 1 week ago
| Part 1: What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costume. Part 2: What's funnier than a dead baby in a clown costume? Half a dead baby in a clown costume. Part 3: What's funnier than a half a dead baby in a clown costume? Half a dead baby in a clown costume next to a kid with down's syndrome. Part 4: What's funnier than half a dead baby in a clown costume next to a kid with down's syndrome? An autistic kid thinking about half a dead baby in a clown costume next to a kid with down's syndrome while concurrently pissing himself in front of a Millwall supporting multiple sclerosis sufferer. | |
Joke by We Are The Lemon, in Illness and mortality > Dead Babies - Tagged dead , baby , dead baby , clown , costume , downs , downs syndrome , half , autism , multiple sclerosis , millwall - Current Score: 27 - Added: 2 years, 0 months ago
| Is it me or does Cherie Blair look like a clown having a heart attack ? | |
Joke by the.rapist, in Celebrity and news events > Cherie Blair - Tagged cherie blair , clown , heart attack - Current Score: 25 - Added: 4 months ago
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